From sausage wearing fashion to toilet romance, here are some of the weirdest Russian girl dating profiles.
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20. The little mermaid
This lovely girl must be really into the whole mermaid fashion thing. I am not sure what the skull she is holding really represents here.
To be her boyfriend you must recite every line Prince Eric says in the cartoon.
19. Hot stuff !
Russian Newspapers, old furniture, blankets on the wall, this girl is 100% Russian approved.
The banana adds a layer of eroticism that can’t really be explained…. for some people.
18. Don’t be a chicken,
Just send her a private message already ! It is obvious she is into you but thinks you are just being a chicken.
Or maybe she is advertising that she has chickens? I don’t know, this is just too confusing. Even the Virgin Mary is looking at her dumbfounded.
17. My love for you is bigger than this potato.
Well would you look at that, a heart shaped potato. It must be a sign of true love ! Regardless, it will have to be cooked tonight because the fridge is empty.
I wonder what the syringe in the back is used for !
16. No room in the front.
This girl is a trooper ! When there is no more room in the front, she just jumps in the trunk, no questions asked !
Or maybe it's an edgy photoshoot? I am not really sure, all I know is that she must be freezing with just a dress on...
15. SPRING IS HERE.
Let’s go down to the lake and take some artsy pictures. It will look great on my profile !
Little did she know, Boris had different things in mind when he heard the word “lake”.
From what I understand, Jaguar is the Russian equivalent of FOUR LOKO. Cheap and loaded with sugar, alcohol and regrets ! After a hot sticky Jaguar bath, this girl is ready to go on a fancy date to the local supermarket.
13. You can’t dump me…
since I am already in the local dump. I don’t get it. I really don’t. What is point of rolling around in trash? I wonder what kind of people she is trying to attract with this weird photoshoot.
12. Hey baby
Those bangs are out of this world ! Love the wall carpet. Not much else to say about this gem.
11. Romance is not dead.
It just resides in the bathroom nowadays. I think she needs to call a plumber instead of trying to fix the ambiance of the room with 11 mini candles...
The strangest part of this photo is without a doubt the huge mystery stain on the girl’s shirt. WHAT IS IT?
Before you start freaking out, yes it is 12 mini candles.
Guys and girls, I am being serious when I say that romance has moved to the bathroom ! I mean look at this beautiful set up. Is this the same girl as number 25 but 30 years younger?
Next time I want a girl to notice me, I will be sure to send her some toilet roses.
9. Lovely Picnic.
It is amazing that a girl hugging toilet roses can be considered insanely classy compared to this.
Maybe she drank too much Jaguar earlier, maybe she is just trashy… I am not sure I would trust this girl with the big knife that is next to her.
8. I want Big Fish only.
This lady knows what she wants, and is not afraid to advertise it. That is one YUUUUGE fish and it should deter any man that is not a serious fishermen from messaging her.
7. Just let me love you.
I swear, this is how I will treat you every night. Bottles and bottles of liquor while you watch the basketball game. Won’t say a peep when your team loses either.
6. Rawr !
Hey there mister, you better like cheetahs because I am obsessed with cheetahs.
I really didn’t know they made full cheetah print jumpsuits. I guess every new dating profile teaches you something about the world.
5. I need a real man.
No need to message this girl if you aren’t the epitome of strength and power that is Putin. Seems pointless to even try, the look in her eyes tells the whole story. No one will ever be good enough when she compares him to her one, true love.
If you date her, you will hardly notice her around the house. She is an expert at hiding in compact spaces. She barely leaves her cocoon so no one will bother you while watching your comrades play hockey.
3. Let’s get drunk and eat chicken fingers.
This girl knows whats up, cold water, cold beer, bathing suits. Everything to make a man happy during the hot Siberian summers.
Just look at the assortment of beer she has prepared ! She even brought some soda so you don’t have to drink the vodka straight.
2. Break my heart…
I break your back. Seriously, your parents won’t recognize you after I’m done with you.
So Yeah, don’t even think of crossing this girl, those eyes scream
“I’m a little on the CRAZY side”
1.Is there any hope left?
If you have lost any faith in finding a decent Russian girl that isn’t borderline crazy, don’t !
There is still hope, and profiles like this are the reason !